#it's not ok to call a trans person a slur just bc they personally suck. it's not ok to call a gay person a slur just bc they personally suc

[evilkitten3]

some of you guys will proudly reblog posts like "criticism of israel is not inherently antisemitic" and then immediately follow that up with the most antisemitic post you can find

yeah criticizing israel isn't inherently antisemitic but a lot of you sure fucking seem to wish it was

[noblehouseofgay]

Long fuckig ramble about morals and jkr and all that

It's so complicated like- seeing people with the opinion on hp I used to have vs my current opinion

Bc I used to get annoyed when I'd see any hp stuff. Bc to me it equals unsafe. It meant to me that you don't respect me or my life, as well as a lot of other people's.

But like seeing marauders fans, ik it's the opposite. Obviously this doesn't count for all fans, I steer clear of millennial white women fans, shit scares me.

But I saw someone talking about how it's a red flag to like any of it, and from someone who's been on both sides- i disagree

If you are actively speaking up against jkr and what she stands for, I think you're allowed to enjoy what you want. Especially if it's a fan made thing? Dude she gets no money from that go wild

I just think the internet as a whole needs to remember what nuance is. The internet feels likr a black hole so often and it sucks. I'd much rather have a civil discussion on shit rather than get called a slur and blocked

Anyway I'm rambling. Obviously I still feel some guilt for being a fan of hp. It literally freaks me out sometimes bc its so conflicting with who I am. But I think the fans (queer marauders fans especially) make it what it is. We took what that trash bag of a human made, and turned it into something more accepting

We saw the racism and stereotypes and all the bs, and we gave those characters real traits instead. We gave them real personalities and stories. And I think that's beautiful. Taking something gross and making it better

Tho I do absolutely understand that some people don't agree. Like I said, I had that opinion for- probably 10 ish years of my life? Idk time isn't real

Tho the mental battle I have is exhausting sometimes. Bc I'm trans. I'm literally the thing she targets the most now. I've grown up seeing the antisemitism and the racism and the homophobia from her. And it's fucked up. But I think- the whole "Harry potter fans need to grow up" shit needs to stop. Bc we could say that about any fucking fandom. A fuck ton of movies/stories/etc are considered childish. A lot of those things also have villains that people love. I think we need to acknowledge that while it's fictional, it can do harm, but we can enjoy the fiction if we still stand against the harm

God I have so many thoughts and I just needed to get it out ig

Fr tho "those fans need to grow up" yeah ok go tell it to star wars fans. Or disney fans. Or Marvel fans. Or doctor who fans. Or fucking any other fan. Bc you can have your criticisms, but get a better argument

[ancientplastics]

kinda over weird people following me so lets go

anyway I support trans people cant believe i gotta say that but ive noticed lots of terfs lately, no my mind woll not be changed

i also support victims of abuse, regardless of gender or what is common in statistics, abuse is abuse, so if youre a guy and youre abused youre welcome here, and obvi if youre nb or a woman yeah ur welcome too, and no my mind cannot be changed if you come in my inbox telling me men cant be abused or some random kind of person isnt ever actually being abused they can only be abusers, you fucking suck, abuse can happen to anyone and has to do with like 2 fucking people in a dynamic and isnt really a societal oppression thing its interpersonal so its on sight if youre going on about this crap ill know youre too far up your own buttcheeks to be bothered to listen to anything but your own bullshit so ill be outta ur life forever

transmascs are valid as well as men, transwomen and women are valid too, nonbinary as well, everybodies chill and if youre some stupid microcosm of hating a specific kind of person for some dumb reason i dont want you here

ace is chill too yk idk let me just list the entire acronym i guess???? unless ur in some sorta bullshit of 'im a map im queer' obviously youre full of shit fuck right off, and if you dont know what MAP is good for you

if you think the word queer is not ok, i dont use it myself but i think you suck for getting in a tizzy about it and claiming youre oppressed bc people use it as an umbrella term, you just are in a state of mind that you cannot comprehend your life and yourself beyond the category of victim and i suggest drawing some edgy art wearing a cool shirt and vibing with yourself, break the rules and stop being scared of everyone this shits cancerous youre gonna die of 31 from anxiety dog, your heart will just stop, make new friends if a friend calls you a bad person for honest mistakes they suck too bad thats a lot of online gay and queer spaces lol, done with that im too old

if you gatekeep the words femme and butch as exclusively lesbian words ive already used them and im bi so have fun being hurt deeply by what i do personally to myself for my own expression

if you dont agree with these points you can escort yourself out or be blocked by me when i find you being sneaky, these aint up for debate

also this is my actual personality i just never express it on here because im worried about some annoying 15 year old kid or 30 year old adult with no life telling me how im wrong because they lack reading comprehension and ive come to the conclusion im too old to bother

also

fuck jk rowling. the bitch is crazy.

basically my beliefs are if you believe in people being hurt for a quick buck or to get yourself happy, and if you cant handle basic respect, leave. and if you cant handle someone being a little stupid or ignorant, or anything veering from a story that benefits you, also leave. im only interested in real shit and kindness. i dont wanna spread misinformation, and i dont wanna feed into bullshit.

fuck terfs also. i hate yall because you act like you give a fuck. but in reality its all a game. and terf aint a slur but if it hurts you like one, good. you deserve to feel bad, youre doing Bad things. dumbasses. its called guilt. ffs

[scriptlgbt]

Cleaning up

Hi! Mod Scix here! We’re trying to cut our way through the inbox, and I’ve compiled a few similar asks. This post will be a lot of ask and very short answer. Please understand this isn’t me being rude, I’m just trying to be efficient so we can get less behind. (hee hee, “behind”)

The first category of questions are errors:

Anonymous said:

(nb 2/3) They’re feminine, but choose against HRT/surgeries (maybe later?) bc they’re on PREP and the combination might lead to lower bone density (they’re a MedSchool stdt, they’d know). And they’re on Prep bc their boyfriend, the protag, is Poz, but their relationship isn’t healthy (constant arguing and protag trying to decide NB-char’s career for them). But NB-char puts up with it for years. Partly for love, partly bc protag accepts their gender, and they think they won’t ever have that again

Anonymous said:

Clarifying a few things about my ask (I'm the anon with the love triangle): 1. Gender/sexuality is of minimum importance in this story. Tough to explain, but the MC doesn't really have a concept of those issues? She's afab but agender for all intents and purposes. 2. The relationship between the two men is way healthier/happier than that between the MC and her ex. 3. There's no animosity between the MC and her ex's current partner.

Sorry, the rest of your questions are missing. If it's still a relevant question, please resend.

The next set I call research:

@teal0cean said:

Hello!! Love you guys! I wanted to ask if you know about the history of HRT for trans males. As in. What was or wasnt available or how the process of transitioning was during some historical period or other (im interested in early 20th Century!)

@yevie said:

Do you have any information on what sorts of resources/information would be available for a (lower-middle class, 20 year old nursing student in a metropolitan area) trans man in 1995? [Resources in terms of both social transitioning, especially in his academic and work setting and also resources in the whole LGBT community aspect and having access to the language to describe his experiences.] (He's also gay and ace, if that's relevant.)

Anonymous said:

I heard theres discourse about the terms FTM/MTF/etc. whats that about??

Anonymous said:

So I've always wondered about this, but I don't to seem like I'm insulting anybody. :( I just really want to know how it works... but I'm to scared to ask so I'm going to drop it here, because I think you will understand! :) (1/2)

You see, If a female decides to do the transision to male. How will she get the male genitalia and loose the female one? I really want to know. Does it hurt? (2/2)

Anonymous said:

How and when do people realize they might be homosexual?

Anonymous said:

Can you think of any really good ideas for a short LGBTQ film? Thank you!

Anonymous said:

Do you know where I could read a bit more about lgbtq+ stereotypes so that I don't do it myself?

Anonymous said:

What is bi/tri/polygender

Anonymous said:

I am making a documentary so i need a good script on it in hindi, would you be able to provide it?

So these are all research questions. Not actually what we are here for, though we do sometimes dive in. The first couple may be tougher to find using google, but the rest are pretty easy to dig up. Or else need to be reworded to narrow the focus. And sometimes the questions we get have built-in assumptions that kinda make it impossible to answer fairly.

Like the assumption that we write Hindi.

If anyone wants to answer these, please be civil.

The next section is the quick answer:

Anonymous said:

Do any trans men choose not to take hormones, even if they're available to the person? I know this answer would really vary from person to person, but I'm thinking of writing a trans man who doesn't want to take hormones, and I'm not sure if that would be considered unusual or not really understanding of the desires most transgender people have.

@pan-at-thedisco said:

Is it plausible for a trans boy who can definitely afford transition surgery to choose not to? Is this something that happens often?

Yeah, transfolk sometimes choose not to get surgery or take hormones. Don’t worry about “often,” it’s fiction.

Anonymous said:

Hello there, I have this male character that I wrote a long time ago and only recently have I been seeing him as bi, now he has crushes on guys but he still ends up with a girl. I can't help but feel like I "cheated" in a way by making a bi character have a hetero relationship but I don't want to change his relationship. I just want to hear your opinion about this.

It's not a hetero relationship, because he is in it. Just don't write it that the new relationship is fixing him, or more real, or anything like that.

Anonymous said:

I want to ask about usage of the word "queer" not in reference to a person or their gender/sexual orientation. Its original meaning meant "strange." It later became a slur, and has now been reclaimed by some in the community. I'm wondering if it's still okay to use it in its original meaning (i.e. "In front of him was the queerest fog he'd ever seen.") or has the evolution of the word has made that no longer acceptable, even if you're writing period/a specific atmosphere?

Go for it! Just be aware it sounds kind of old-fashioned.

Anonymous said:

hi! do you think it would be considered ok for a nonbinary character in a historical setting to use their language's equivalent of "it/its" pronouns? i'm cis and i'm worried people will take it the wrong way, but the character just wants to be convenient as their language only has one set of gender-neutral pronouns and it's for inanimate objects

No. If it's a fictional language, then it can have a gender-unspecified pronoun that doesn't only refer to objects.

@dreamwishing said:

I have a rather odd question. Odd enough that I'm not sure where to ask. This may not be the right place, and if it's not, maybe you could point me in a direction? That would be great. Everyone asks how to avoid stereotyping lgbtq+ people, but...how do I avoid stereotyping homophobes and the like?

...make them rounded, complete characters with more than one thing in their life.

Anonymous said:

I have a villainous character who is a combination/amalgamation of various people of different genders/sexualities, and they don't have a gender. I'm planning to refer to the character with they/them pronouns, and it just doesn't feel right to give them a gender. But since they're a bad guy, would it be... what's the word... transphobic (I guess? you know what i mean) to portray them as agender? I have other agender characters, if that makes a difference. (It's fantasy btw)

Having other agender characters -- well-represented -- solves the issue for you just fine. Also, make the villain interesting. I love a good villain. 

Anonymous said:

Will the mod/s be monitoring the comments at all? I've seen quite a few hateful replies and reblogs toward nonbinary and demisexual people. I would love to keep following, but it sucks having to be subjected to people invalidating my gender and sexuality in the comments.

There is nothing we can do about comments. "Never read the comments" is often a good idea. Alternately, block the blogs that are evil, and you'll soon find it was the same few all along. Anything really terrible, let us know so we can block them ourselves, and let our readers know.

That was a lot of work. I know it doesn’t look like much, but it took me a few hours and I’m wiped. Some kinds of work are more labor than they appear, and this is that kind of labor.

Still and all: love you all! Just not that way. 

~~Mod Scix

[thedreadvampy]

Queer identity and exclusionism

I mean the core thing is I identify strongly as queer and bisexual and I think it's super important to maintain an inclusive and open definition of queerness, but also I do get why so many people, specifically lesbians, get angry about the frequency of people implying that a) being gay is easier than being bi/ace/etc (because it definitely isn't, it's just that different communities deal with different types of issues, and as a bi woman I have different problems with representation and discrimination than a lesbian, or a bi man, and that isn't like...a quantifiable comparison, it's not a matter of being More or Less Oppressed, some of the forces acting on (for eg) those three groups are the same but may manifest differently and some of the forces are unique to certain experiences. It certainly isn't likely to be LESS confusing or stressful to be 'just' gay, it may be DIFFERENTLY so but being gay isn't taking the easy way by any stretch of the imagination.) B) Being gay is somehow a more limited/less enlightened identity than being non-monosexual (I'm not huge on the term monosexual rn but I can't think of another way to express myself) It isn't intrinsically more limiting than any other identity. It's admittedly difficult for me to imagine monosexual attraction, just like it's difficult for me to imagine monogamous attraction or Being A Dude or being anything other than I am, but that doesn't mean it's lesser or not real, it just means it's not an experience I personally have. Maybe everyone has the capacity for attraction to multiple genders, I don't know, but having the potential capacity for a thing isn't the same as being that thing even if so, and only being attracted to one gender is as valid as anything else. To me, the idea that Everyone's A Bit Bi has always seemed instinctively probable, but consciously I think it does a disservice both to people who aren't comfortable with having their gayness called into question and to bi/non-monosexual people, who deserve to have their specific experience recognised (much as gender is a spectrum but saying nobody is entirely male or female does a great disservice to trans and nb people) C) sexuality is a flaw (this one's complex imo because we DO live in a vastly oversexualised society where people with less/no sexual attraction are sidelined and made to feel broken, simultaneously a lot of the ways ace people describe allosexuality can be kind of...condescending? Maybe not the right word, but there's often a sense in ace Discourse that all people who DON'T identify with some sort of ace-spectrum identity are being wholly led by their sexual urges and that this is a failing, and for sexual lgbtq folks who have spent their lives trying to feel ok with their sexuality this can be very alienating and painful. Which sucks a LOT because I think being shamed for not being Correctly Attracted is something most lgbt people, but particularly ace and gay people, have in common, and the system of heteronormativity and oversexuality are, if not the same thing, at the very least inextricably linked in current culture) D) that all queer people can speak with authority on all queer issues, and it's ok for non-lesbians to speak over lesbians when it comes to specifically lesbian issues (I'm aaaargh on this one tbh because it CAN be a very valid concern but I also often see lesbians claiming exclusive right to speak on Wlw issues, which AREN'T necessarily lesbian-exclusive, but in principle I do get it and certainly people who aren't gay talking authoritatively about being gay is a problem whether they're straight, bi, ace or other, and I understand why it's pretty problematic if the ONLY voices in the community that are uplifted are the voices of people who aren't gay, and the messaging of those voices is downplaying gayness in favour of a nebulous, non-specific queer identity What it comes down to imo is that while I think exclusionism and the queer-is-a-slur discourse are real issues and really obnoxious, the queer community and label do raise genuine concerns in people (mostly lesbians) who are not necessarily being dicks, they have been made to feel genuinely alienated by contemporary discourse even though in my experience the vast, vast majority of the queer community don't agree with downplaying gay identities, it's worth listening to people's concerns on that front because the Discourse can have unintended implications and we do need the capacity to recognise that I hate when people start yelling that QUEER IS A SLUR AND ALWAYS HAS BEEN AND ALWAYS WILL BE AND STOP CALLING ANYONE INCLUDING YOURSELF IT but I think when people who we can otherwise see are self-aware, capable of critical thinking and inclusive in their politics have a major issue with the framing of queer identity it's worth taking that on board bc it's easy to get dogmatic about queerness and conclude that because the core is sound any criticism or feelings of alternation are the fault of the person feeling alienated and don't need to be considered which they do even if the conclusion we draw from that consideration is that they're wrong And that doesn't mean every individual response needs considering but Trends In Discourse probably do (exclusionism is still bullcrap but I suspect it comes from a disaffection with queer discourse in many cases rather than a legit issue with the group in question. Which in many ways makes it MORE bullshit but does mean it's useful to consider exclusionism and queer Discourse in tandem)